In addition to the trauma, there is a ton of self-criticism. So part of the unconscious conversation when we get activated is a judgement, a criticism about being activated. One part of self being nasty to another part. So this compounds the trauma, makes the experience more acute. The solution is compassion for that critical voice, rather than joining with it. For this to happen, one must consciously cultivate that wise, compassionate, kind, strong, supportive voice. Like Abramowitz says “each day set an intention” to speak to oneself with a kind, compassionate voice of strength.